People In Town 

1. People In Town

On Saturdays I tend to visit my local music shop to check for any cool CDs but this is becoming more and more of a nightmare, first you get into town and there is ALWAYS a family of fat bastards all walking next to each other as slowly...
Why people on MySpace are fucking idiots 

2. Why people on MySpace are fucking idiots

This is a collection of things people have put on their status message on Myspace and then my answer to them because I got pissed off! Pre-script: FYI, girls, you just sound stupid saying that you are “bi”. About 90 percent...
35 Things I Hate… 

3. 35 Things I Hate…

People who can’t fathom anything outside their own personal gain. Shows about rich american teenagers who talk quickely to make it seem as if they have intelligence. The double standards of the media that will parade a 12 year...
10 New Laws For When I Take Over The World 

4. 10 New Laws For When I Take Over The World

Any Biscuits that are coloured yellow are hereby banned (unless they are party rings). People have to take an IQ test before procreating, I know it sounds abit fascist but more and more I see big fat idiot chav girls with 6 children,...
Some More Shit 

5. Some More Shit

Idiots – more often these days, there seems to be an increase in retarded cake bakers walking around talking absolute garbage and passing it off as “being original” or “having a laugh” no, what you are...


Barclays Bank

Recently I came into a bit of money in the form of a cheque so I took it into my bank for them to put it into MY account, the place where MY money is kept. so of course after the “working days”...

Headphonesite.com

I was in the market for new headphones so I tried a few pairs out at a local electronics shop however they cost a fortune so I thought I would try the internet. I looked around for a company that came...

The Daily Mail

well it was only a matter of time before I got around to this shit storm of a bad newspaper, it is an even bigger doommonger than me, and at least I do mine with elements of humour, they take themselves...

More Rules For When I take Over The...

1. the word celebrity is instantly banned and anyone in the media must have a dam good reason to be there, i.e. no more Kerry fucking katona or Peter fuckface Andre, any such non entity will be instantly...

When I Take Over The Planet

The following rules will be effective immediately. 1. Christmas decorations will only be permitted in the month of December, anyone breaking this rule will be banned from having decorations for life, and...

bands making quick cash

not so long ago one of my favourite electro-rock band started advertising a new album which was due, it had been 2 years since their last one so I thought “great!” so as their third album I...

Myspace status Rant 2010

thinkin bout stuff hmm why did u come back? argh I need to talk but meh lol – yes that’s about the level of self involvement and idiocy I’d expect from some ugly bitch who thinks she’s...

the culture of litigation

Every fucking day there are those adverts which start with some silly cow with a really bad fringe or that guy who was “actually given the wrong type of ladder” for a job he was doing –...

4 things

another little list of things that have been getting on my nerves. 1. “Alternative” Music – These days it seems so many of these half arsed emo-esque bands are being allowed to write...

Hey There Fat Twat!

Before I begin this I must tell you that I am by no means thin, I am abit overweight and for that I am ashamed, however yesterday I went to a supermarket for the first time in a while only to be confronted...

About Us

About Us We are the Doommongers. Everything is shit in some way or other, we are the people that tell you why... Should you wish to add your own doom experiences go to the \"drop a note\" tab and well, er drop a note.

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More Rules For When I take Over The Planet